NEWS

Funeral home accused of refusing to cremate gay man

Sarah Fowler
The Clarion-Ledger

A Mississippi funeral home is being sued for allegedly refusing to cremate an elderly gay man. However, the funeral home says it never refused service to the man or his family.

Jack Zawadski

Picayune Funeral Home, in Picayune, is accused of refusing to cremate the remains of Robert "Bob" Huskey after learning he was married to a man at the time of his death, according to attorney Beth Littrell with Lambda Legal, a New York-based organization working for the civil rights of lesbians, gay men, and people with HIV/AIDS.

"After 52 years together and after having made pre-arrangements to ensure what was already a sad and tragic day would be as easy as possible, they were told that the funeral home was unwilling to honor their agreement and, as a result, their already sad day become immeasurably worse," Littrell said.

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Lambda Legal and Jackson attorney Rob McDuff filed the lawsuit in March in Mississippi's Pearl River County Circuit Court seeking a jury trial and unspecified damages.

The suit identifies Brewer Funeral Services, the parent company of Picayune Funeral Home, and owners Ted and Henrietta Brewer.

When reached Tuesday afternoon, Henrietta Brewer vehemently and tearfully denied the allegations. Brewer said the funeral home has served numerous gay families over the years.

"It’s not true," she said of the allegation. "We have done many gay families."

Offering an example, Brewer said a man in Florida sends flowers every season for the funeral home to place on the grave of his late husband who is buried in Memorial Gardens, a cemetery owned and maintained by the Brewers.

She would not provide the identification of the widower.

Brewer said she doesn't know where the allegation stems from, saying, "We did not refuse this man because he was gay. We didn’t refuse him at all."

She said there was no contract between the funeral home and Huskey's family.

According to the lawsuit, Brewer Funeral Services breached its agreement to transport and cremate Huskey's body after learning his next of kin was a man, allegedly saying they did not "deal with their kind."

Littrell said a contract was not signed but a verbal contract was entered into between the funeral home and John Gaspari, the nephew of Huskey's husband, Jack Zawadski.

Before Huskey's passing, Gaspari reportedly called multiple funeral homes in the area. The lawsuit alleges he and Picayune Funeral Home agreed on transportation and cremation for Huskey for $1,795. The day before Huskey's death, Gaspari again called the funeral home. According to the complaint, he was assured the funeral home "would take care of everything," all that was needed was a call from the nursing home when Huskey died.

The Picayune Funeral Home reportedly sent Huskey's nursing home, Bedford Care Center of Picayune, the necessary paperwork to be signed by the next of kin in order to transport his body.

Huskey died the next day, on May 11, 2016. He was 86.

Zawadski signed the paperwork, and the nursing home sent it to the funeral home.

Gaspari said in the complaint that he received a call from the nursing home saying the funeral home was refusing to provide services for Huskey. Huskey's body was ultimately transported to Hattiesburg, 90 miles away.

"If it’s a mother, father, sister, brother, whoever, when somebody passes away, it’s heartbreaking," Gaspari said. "Then to have to deal with discrimination in death when you’re already grieving."

The Brewer's attorney, Silas McCharen, denied the allegations.

"This is not a civil rights case or a discrimination case," McCharen said in an emailed statement. "Ms. Brewer denies she ever spoke the words 'deal with their kind' to anyone, including anyone at the nursing home where Plaintiff's decedent, Bob Huskey, passed away. Picayune Funeral Home has never refused to provide services based on sexual orientation."

However, Littrell said they have evidence that backs up the claim.

"I am confident that we will be able to prove through witness, phone records and other means that what we claim in the lawsuit is in fact what happened," she said.

Huskey and Zawadski met in California in 1965. Huskey was a special education teacher and Zawadski an antiques dealer. Set up through mutual friends, the pair went to a movie premiere for their first date.

Zawadski doesn't remember the name of the movie but he does remember the way he felt with Huskey.

Six months later, the two moved in together. It was more than 52 years ago, but Zawadski remembers it was on a Friday night. And Huskey's furniture was hideous.

Chuckling, Zawadski said, "I didn’t care for his furniture, it was all paper-covered wood. We stored his stuff in one of the bedrooms."

Over the course of their life together, the couple made memories camping and prospecting in the Mexico desert and fishing in the rivers of Colorado. They moved to Colorado after the death of Huskey's father where they bought a restaurant they wished they hadn't and then, "with 60 bucks in my pocket," to Zawadski's native Wisconsin where they owned an apple farm.

They had friends of course, and a dog, Zawadski said, but they mostly kept to themselves.

"We didn’t go to bars or gay organizations or anything like that at the time," he said. "We had each other. What else did we need?"

The couple moved to Mississippi in 1997 to retire. They dreamed of going to Maryland to get married but didn't have the money to make the trip. Bob's health was declining, first with an ankle surgery and then with a bypass surgery.

When marriage equality became the law of the land in 2015, the couple got married in Hancock County.

"He was so happy after this, Bob, that we finally got together," Zawadski recalled.

Less than a month later, Zawadski was helping Huskey eat, walk and take care of his personal hygiene. They called in hospice.

Then, Huskey fell twice in one week. Zawadski had to call an ambulance each time so EMTs could pick his husband up off the floor. They made the decision to put Bob in a nursing home. He died the following May.

Zawadski said regardless of the lawsuit he is still grieving for his husband, and, after 50 years, always may be.

"I still miss him, what else can you say, you know? He was a wonderful person, very honest. He loved life. We loved each other."

Contact Sarah Fowler at sfowler@gannett.com or 601-961-7303. Follow her on Facebook and Twitter.